


Safe

by SilentWaves



Category: Dr. STONE (Manga)
Genre: Bad Parenting, Gen, Heavy Subject Matter, Introspection, Sad with a Happy Ending, Substance Abuse, if he had a shitty life, kind of, mentions of abuse, not Gen though, or at least a hopeful ending, sad childhood, very Gen-focused on what his past might have been like
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-02
Updated: 2020-06-02
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:40:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24498835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilentWaves/pseuds/SilentWaves
Summary: Asagiri Gen has never felt safe in his entire life. That is, until he joins the Kingdom of Science.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 48





	Safe

**Author's Note:**

> me: I hate it when people just angst the heck outta Gen. Let the man live >:(
> 
> also me: *writes this*
> 
> (I usually write more fluffy stuff, but I think this still counts because of the ending so...yeah. I'm taking the angsty Gen trope and twisting it to fit my own tastes oops)

The interviewers love to ask him why he went into the field of psychology. His answer varied for nearly all of them, but they would always inevitably tie back to a lie.

“Well, I’m just doing what I love! Nothing wrong with that, is there?”

But it wasn’t. Nobody would ever question him on it, and for that Gen was grateful. They didn’t need to know that he only did it for survival. That wouldn’t be good for business, and if nothing else, Gen thinks that he wants to live in a nice, peaceful apartment for the rest of his life, publishing a book every once in a while if finances were running low.

At his first home, it was apparent that some people just weren’t meant to be together. It was of no fault of his father that his mother had a horrible tendency to cheat, and it was of no fault of his mother that his father had a terrible drinking habit that left him incoherent and occasionally dangerous.

Half the time, they were too absorbed in their own lives, their own worlds, to ever even notice Gen. He wasn’t starved or anything, but if he wanted any food that wasn’t twice-reheated leftovers, he’d have to learn how to make it himself. He always turned down the volume on the TV so that he could make out their arguments, in case either one of his parents ever got dangerously violent. If that did end up happening, Gen learned quickly that he should avoid them until they calmed down.

Gen learned from a young age how to study people. It was more obvious when the two parties were angry, so Gen almost laughs whenever he thinks back to the bitter memories of his first home, because there could have been nothing else that taught Gen the basics of his field.

He’s in no way grateful for them, and would probably be happier as a regular businessman, because that would mean that he had nothing to owe to his biological parents.

When Gen’s father died of alcohol poisoning, his mother had moved on too fast for Gen to ever think she cared at all for him. 

They had lived in a few more homes after that, each one feeling less safe than the last. It was the second house where Gen found a book on basic magician’s tricks, and it was there when he learned how to lie, because _no sir, I promise you I didn’t see any books in this room. If it shows up, I’ll let you know as soon as I see it_. By the fourth house, he had mastered every trick in the book.

By then, his mother had grown extremely depressed, and overdosed on heroin two weeks afterwards. 

Gen, legally, would have had to be sent to an orphanage. He decided it was the best course of action if he wanted to survive.

Once there, as one of the older kids at age 11, he would find it very easy to slip away unnoticed, as the caretakers were too preoccupied with the younger troublemakers. Whenever Gen was away, he could start working on his magic act. He earned enough pocket change to buy himself a library card, which he used to access the computers there.

After he had published his first hastily-written and (admittedly, not all that well-researched) first novel, he had celebrated his 15th birthday. It wasn’t a _good_ psychology book by any means, but it was never designed to be. It just needed to be fun and trashy enough that others his age would be willing to pick it up. 

The money from his first deal got him enough money to buy a full set of magicians’ tricks and a fancy-enough suit to start performing for real.

He didn’t feel safe then either, because any day he could be kicked out of the orphanage and left with nowhere to sleep.

And he was. But that’s why Gen was prepared, and stole the money for the plane ticket to America long before it had happened.

He knew that he would never feel safe in a foreign country of which the language Gen barely spoke, but at this point in his life Gen didn’t care about feeling safe. The first thing he did upon his arrival was purchase corn syrup and red food colouring, as well as a box of ziploc bags.

He studied there for 3 years, and decided he would be better off returning to Japan when he realized just how lax the gun laws were. No amount of blood bags would protect him from a bullet.

He had a brilliant 11-month period where he rose to fame, and was solidly over 19 and on the fast-track to meeting his lifelong goal of having a cozy life when the deadly light encased all of humanity.

He didn’t feel safe, but he did feel relaxed for the first time in his life. The stone was almost coaxing him to sleep, and if Gen knows psychology (which he does), he’d know that the human brain is conditioned to fall asleep after around 10-15 minutes of complete stillness. 

Gen figures that there’s no fighting against human nature. He could breathe just fine, and while he couldn’t see anything, the darkness had been a better comfort for Gen than it had been a fear. In the darkness, Gen would never be found. In the darkness, Gen wasn’t quite safe, but he could finally rest.

He snapped back to awareness in what felt like seconds later, though judging from his surroundings Gen could tell that it had been much longer.

Standing in front of him was Shishio Tsukasa, someone who was powerful, famous, and handing Gen some clothes. Gen remembers him well from the single interview that they’ve done together, as a pair of remarkable youth who’ve risen through the popularity rankings like air through water.

And Gen remembers that Shishio Tsukasa was very, very, dangerous.

There would be no safety here. Judging by his surroundings, he had really re-emerged into the world reverted to a primal age. And in these ages, the weak could only beg to survive. 

Gen didn’t need to do that though, because Tsukasa had seen Gen’s strength in his mentalist skills as equally valuable as Tsukasa’s physical prowess. They were, in Tsukasa’s opinion, equals. But Gen knows better.

He had to look for weaknesses. He would never survive in this primitive world on his own — he’d die to the first lion that came by. Gen had to be Tsukasa’s best friend and worst enemy.

It was hell.

A single bad move meant that Gen’s neck would be broken before he could even register his leader’s movement. A single bad move would mean nowhere to run and nowhere to hide.

This was Gen’s test of survival, and survive Gen did.

He had a brief moment of admiration while staring at a certain tree, because anyone clever enough to count the years through that pitch darkness had to be someone truly admirable. That person might just be great enough for Gen to allow himself to trust. 

But Gen wasn’t that naive. There would be no way this “Senku” person could really be capable of that. Anyways, what was a bit of counting compared to Hyouga’s spear skills or Homura’s gymnastics?

It was nothing. It wasn’t anything to admire. Really. But Gen can’t help but think of how much of a fighter this person must be. Gen had given in to the darkness as soon as he felt the possibility of safety within his reach. The person who carved the date into the tree though, he must be different. This is someone who refused to give in. He must be the kind of person who would create safety rather than search aimlessly for it.

This “Senku” could be someone that provides the shelter that Gen’s been searching for his whole life. 

But he’s not getting his hopes up. For now, all he can do is follow his leader’s commands. He will search for this man who may or may not be dead, and he will find a way to survive in this primitive stone age.

When he found Ishigami Village, he wasn’t surprised in the least to see that the genius scientist who counted the seconds for millenia found a way to overcome death. He _was_ surprised, however, to see that there were so many other people who weren’t from the modern age. 

He couldn’t trust them. The self-proclaimed scientist was shoddy at best, and the materials he provided them to work with were dangerous even if they handled them with the utmost care. And not to mention the workload. _Ugh_ , the workload. 

Still, as he saw the bright light of civilization, he can’t help but be amazed. From what’s seemingly nothing, to something brilliant. It was how Gen had lived his life, and it was the policy that the Kingdom of Science lives by. 

Gen doesn’t know if he’s ever going to fully trust them, but he knows that the path of science is infinitely better than the path of cowardice and fear of those with power. 

But nevertheless, he was right to doubt the villagers.

As he lays, bruised and beat up, but _alive_ , he thinks of all the things that he would miss the most from his life had he really died there.

_Cola_ , for one. Gen would miss cola. It was the first treat that he got in the orphanage, and it was the drink that he’s become accustomed to while in the States. _Just one more bottle. Anything from the world that I’ve grown used to. Anything from the world where I’ve made a comfortable living._

And when he makes the ridiculous request only to get a shining smile in response, Gen thinks that maybe he was right in rebelling.

It was probably the least-certain action that Gen has ever done. But there would be no liar better than he, and there would be no opportunity to simply _admire_ the world if science was destroyed along with Ishigami Senku. He never thought of it like that. He always thought he never made time to simply _be_ , but he was clearly wrong if he recalled all those things of the past. _Light, treats, assuredness_ were a few things that Gen hadn’t even realized he missed until he saw them again with his own eyes. recreated for the sake of humanity’s revival.

Upon his return to the village, after his betrayal was made apparent, he decides that he could start trusting the villagers. The attack on him was from another untrusting fellow, and Gen only survived because he trusted the village even less. But that, Gen finds, while getting the workout of his _life_ during the crafting sessions, is no way to live.

Gen has never felt safe his entire life. But when he sees Kohaku’s Tsukasa-like strength used for helping rather than destroying, and Chrome’s unending enthusiasm for the wonders of nature and creation, and Senku’s unending stream of perseverance… Well, Gen has no choice but to allow himself to be caught in their current, and simply enjoy himself for once in his life. He had no less threats in life than what he had before, but now, he no longer feels like he’s facing them alone. 

People will keep mistrusting, and Gen knows that he has every right to continue doing so himself, but he thinks he should start to wonder at, rather than fear, the world around him. 

He might not ever get over his issues. He still keeps a few spare blood bags tucked away in room corners and hidden under the loosest parts of his clothes, just in case. But it’s easy to forget about them when he’s staring at a man-made car, or a paper airplane as it explodes, or a tree carved with the consciousness of thousands of years. 

For the first time in his life, Gen’s doesn’t feel any disdain for his skills in psychology. He doesn’t owe his biological parents shit for their arguing and the constant, imposing threat that they created. Instead, he owes it to himself for surviving. He fought for a life worth living, with skills worth developing. It was _Asagiri Gen_ who kept him alive, and nobody else. And now, Gen feels at ease knowing that he’s also using his skills for others as well as himself. 

And for the first time in his life, Gen finds a home that he can trust in the Kingdom of Science, among the deadly acids and the heavy workload, and he’s willing to do whatever it takes to keep it safe.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This is a bit different from what I usually write (which is, very fluffy stuff) so yeah. Keep in mind that I did include a few experiences that I personally haven't gone through/over-dramatized the others (I won't be saying which, for uh. obvious personal reasons), so if I portrayed something horribly wrong, please please please let me know!
> 
> You can talk to me on [Tumblr](https://voicelesswaves.tumblr.com/) or just leave a comment! I personally don't like to see a lot of angst unless there's a happy ending, but please let me know your thoughts on how I did with this one!


End file.
